How to write your wedding vows

As a couple, you'll have your own ideas around wedding vows. While some parts of the ceremony are a legal requirement, other parts allow making changes, so they fit with your views on the life you plan together. There's also an opportunity to include personal vows to make a promise to your partner in front of friends and family. So no pressure! However formal or relaxed you decide to be, the vows should always feel genuine and authentic to you. So, how to get started?

It may seem daunting, but adding a personal touch to your vows doesn't have to be a monumental task. With these simple tips, you can share meaningful words with your partner...


Set aside some time, find a quiet place and jot some ideas down on paper. What are the important things you may want to say? When and how did you meet? When did you know they were the one? What about them makes you smile? Do you have children you want to include? What are the promises you want to make about your future together?

Research the best bits

Now you have an idea of the sorts of things you'd like to say, take a look at some examples. There are many lists online of the best vows, romantic vows, emotional vows, religious vows. What feels right for you and your partner? What will you be comfortable saying in front of others? Perhaps a poem or a speech?

Signed, sealed, delivered...

Now you have some clearer ideas of what you want to say and the form you want them to take, it's time to write them down. When complete, the vows should take around one minute to say out loud, this is around 120-130 words. So have a look at your notes and decide which are the most important things for you to say. If you want to say more, you can always write a more extended version and give these to your partner privately. This is also an option if you do not feel comfortable saying things in front of others but that you want to say to your partner.

Practice makes perfect

Once you have your vows, practise saying them, first alone and then perhaps in front of a friend. They may be able to offer advice and help calm you if you are nervous. You could also try recording yourself and watching it back. This can help you to hear how fast you're talking, how clear you are and whether the message you want to make is straightforward.

Ask the experts

Finally, if you are struggling or are finding this task daunting, help is at hand. Professional ghostwriters can help you generate the perfect vows. Inexpensive services, starting at less than £30, ask you to complete a questionnaire filled with your unforgettable memories and details of your relationship and lives. They then use this information to compile one-of-a-kind vows that you can accept, ask for alterations or use a basis for your own final vows. Helping take the stress out of something which can be so enjoyable and add a personal, romantic touch to your big day.